cinder blocks

I bore my testimony today for the first time in a while.  "Yes, I am endowed and no, I did not serve a mission."  Yup, that happened.  But it was a day of wonderful meetings to say the least.  Over the last couple days I have had a lot of time alone (which I have come to not like so much..). 

In my time alone I have realized two things about myself:

1. I wear my heart on my sleeve

2. I wear my emotions on my shoulders

This is how I feel:

Do you know that cinder blocks are not meant TO BE CARRIED!?  They are heavy.  If you drop them they break, and hurt if dropped on you.  But this is how I feel - weighed down.

In discussing the Atonement today in Relief Society, I was reminded of a lesson I had about cinder blocks.  That is what the Atonement is there for; we don't need to chain our troubles, sins, trials, afflictions, or problems to ourselves and drag them around - we need to detach from them, hand them to the Lord because  HE HAS ALREADY SUFFERED FOR THEM.  We are doing no good and learning nothing when we try to take life's troubles and carry them ourselves.  We need help.  We need the Lord.  We need to rely on the fact that HE KNOWS WHAT HE IS DOING.

Life is hard, and then you die (as Uncle Timmy would say).  But let us use the Atonement.  That's what it is there for.  The Savior lives, loves us, and wants only our happiness and what is best for each of us individually.  Make choices.  Smile.  Be happy.  Rely upon the Lord.  And don't carry around your burdens - it hurts!

I feel like I have two thoughts I am trying to merge into one, if only I was better with my words.  I need to eat. I need to sleep.  I need to focus on what matters - school, work, the gospel.  And I cannot do those things when I choose to wear my heart and emotions on my outward appearance.  Those personal issues need to go to the Lord.  That is a goal of mine.  I know the Atonement works, but I need to actually use it and not think I can do everything myself - because I can't.  I'm not strong enough - but the Lord is.  I'm an emotional wreck - but the Lord knows how to succor me.

Luke 22:42-43

42 Saying, Father, if thou be willing, remove this cup from me: nevertheless not my will, but thine, be done.

43 And there appeared an angel unto him from heaven, strengthening him.

I know this to be true.  Heavenly Father, Jesus Christ, the Holy Ghost, and angels can be there to help us, lift us, strengthen us.  In all things.

little kids!

Fun fact about me:

 

I LOVE LITTLE KIDS!  They are so dang cute!  They make me smile and laugh and feel all warm inside!  So, in honor oh little kids, I am sharing a few commercials with you - they brighten my day and I hope they do the same for you!  Enjoy! ;) [ps: the last one is my most favorite..]

 

 

 

i wanna talk about me

I'm a pushy person. Do you know that I am a pushy person? At least I can admit it, right? The thing about me is that when I know what I want I go for it; I fight for it; I do what ever is in my power to achieve it. So forgive me, or don't. I need to get to the point though where I can quit and not be crushed if I know it cannot be achieved. Quit may not be the right word; maybe step back or step aside are better terms. Either way, I need to recognize "red flags" as I've learned to call them. Maybe life will be easier when I can master that!!

I love my family. Meet them! They will rock your world!

 

I am NOT a decision maker.  I have a difficult time making choices.  About anything and everything.  Why is that if I am a pushy person and supposedly know what I want?  Hm.. Interesting..  Why are choices so hard to make sometimes?  I think it is difficult to admit when you actually have to buck up and DO something.  I hate being vulnerable and putting myself out there.  I don't want to be hurt or rejected or have it not work.  But sometimes, you just have to put yourself out there, regardless of what will happen.  No one likes to be hurt, BUT MAKE A CHOICE.

 

That's another thing: I think things are black or white - there is no grey area.  You cannot have one foot in and one foot out.  MAKE A CHOICE.  Yes, it is that simple.

 

So maybe this should be titled: "Make A Choice" instead..  I guess I am at a point in my life where I don't want to do things half way.  I want to make choices, go all in, take chances, trust in the Lord, put myself out there, let myself be vulnerable, be forward, be honest, be open - "fear not, let your hearts be comforted..." Doctrine and Covenants 98:1.

 

Maybe this was more for myself, an awakening of sorts; a realization that I need to make some choices and changes if I want to progress, for the definition if insanity is "doing the same thing over and over expecting different results" - I cannot do what I have always done!  I cannot be stuck in the ruts I have been before - it is not healthy!

 

Anyway, I hope it inspires you to look inside and figure out what you want and how to go about life making the best choices.  Look to the Lord in all things.  Counsel with him.  Let him guide you and all will work out.  "Thy will, O Lord, be done."  Don't overthink it, just go for it.

 

Kids Say the Darndest Things: Sammy

Dec. 30, 2012

I went to pick Sam up at Grandma Mary's, and this is what she said to me when I walked in:

• "Did my mom tell you to pick me up?!"

On the drive home after picking Sam up:

• Amric: "Sam, will you rub my hand for me?  I'm leaving for two years.."
• Sam: "Sure. But pretty soon you're going to have to rub it yourself!!"

Also on the way home:

• Me: "Sam, I see you all the time because I live so close to you!"
• Sam: "Well, you live in Provo, so it's not really that close.."

Almost back to the Sobczak home in Draper:

• Me: "This is the right exit right?"
• Sam: "Wally, you come visit all the time - you should know where to go!"

Jan. 01, 2013

Dad reading a book to Sammy ("The Little Mermaid"):

• Dad: "...Ariel" (pronounced R-E-EL)
• Sammy: "Papi, Ariel (R-E-EL)?!  Are you speaking Spanish?!
• Dad: "She is not very modest is she?"
• Sammy: "Well, she is a mermaid, so she has to wear that."

Jan. 02, 2013:

Sam giving us a tumbling show:

• Anona: "Sammy, can you do a cartwheel?"
• Sam: "A cartwheel?  Well, what is a cartwheel?  Nana, will you come show me?!"

Goodbye 2012

Here is another holiday tradition I have not participated in:

 

I have never been kissed at midnight on New Year's.

 

Now for a quick blurb about my year.

This has been quite the year for me.  Married, separated, school, work, back to the singles ward, learning to be social again, dating, and so on.  Up and down like a roller coaster I have gone.  But as difficult as this year was I am grateful for it.  I have learned more about myself than I thought possible and I have grown spiritually and emotionally more than ever before.  How grateful I am for my family and friends, to be worthy to enter the temple, for the gospel and my testimony, and for my Savior Jesus Christ and my Heavenly Father.  So as I close out this year I hope that I take to heart the things I have learned and to be an example and true friend to those around me.  Thank you to all of my family and friends (and my Savior of course) - I would be lost without you.  So long 2012, I welcome with open arms what 2013 will bring!

 

 

 

Good luck to all in the coming year!  I leave you with this thought from President Joseph Smith:

“The devil has no power over us only as we permit him; the moment we revolt at anything which comes from God, the devil takes power.”

The Odds Were Against Us

Oh what a day it was!  Here is a list of what occurred:

• Mom lost her temple recommend
• We had an eventful time at the Verizon store trying to change Anona's phone number to Amric's iPhone
• Zane and Marion both forgot their temple recommends
• Anona thought she lost her recommend - we got to the temple and it was not in her wallet
• Jenni had to change her temple dress THREE - count 'em - three times
• This has nothing to do with family events, but I thought it was interesting:
• There were over 70 sealings performed at the Salt Lake City Temple today
• Hatch Family Chocolate escaped our plans when Anona got a phone call about one of her daughters...
• We could not find an urgent care that was open or "urgent" (an hour and a half wait!!)
• When we finally found one, x-rays were taken and we came to find that CiCi broke her tibia

I felt all day as if Satan was working his hardest to have us not be at the temple and to have contention!!  That little devil!!

In the midst of it all we did see an apostle, Elder L. Tom Perry, how cool is that?!  My poor little CiCi will be okay, she just has to be taken back in on Monday to have a cast put on her leg.  Mom was able to get into our session thanks to a vouching Bishop.  Anona did find her recommend, having gone back to the car to search for it.  And now we are home safe again.  This day was the cherry on top to end this year of 2012 - what a year this has been!!

never been kissed.

Ok so I have been kissed, but in the spirit of Christmas I have to admit that I have never been kissed under the mistletoe.. If only..

 

 

Merry Christmas - EVE!!